A Highlanders Obsession - Vonnie Davis 5* Book Review

(could contain spoilers)

Kilts, Willies, Gnats chewing balls... are some of the things to look forward to in this book. Featuring Creighton a hot Scottish Laird, with long flowing hair, blowing in the highland winds like a shampoo advert. He is also built like a brick shit house! (I wouldn't mind tossing his caber!)

Being a Scot he loves a tipple of Whiskey and is horny as hell. Unfortunately, he is stuck running the family business (B&B castle), he inherited following his fathers death. Along with that he has to keep in line the crazy world of shifters and oversee the reading of a will, following the death of an old friend. He just wants it over and done with as soon as possible so things can get back to normal, but the moment he sets his eyes on the new American accompanying her grandmother to the reading, his inner bear lays claim 'mine' and winning her heart becomes his number one priority. Grrrr! 

The author, American, Vonnie Davis, has taken on the unenviable task of writing this Scottish Bear Shifter, as he appeared one night at the foot of her bed and told her to write this story. Yep, she is bat shit crazy! As such this story is a delight to read, because she dare not balls it up in case he reappears and sticks a claw in her hoohar! (Not that she would mind)

Paisely, is the lucky bitch who gets to win his heart. She has a gift/secret of her own. No she doesn't turn into a bear and let him share her honey pot, she can talk to the animals. (Photographs by Katerina Plotnikova... I sent these to Vonnie when she was writing the story as inspiration, so I am sharing them here too) 

The perk/curse of Paisley being a Dr Dolittle is she can hear animals talk, that includes shifters in human form using telepathy. Mr Lusty Pants is teased by his brothers over his bears obsession with the new lassie in town. Creighton is just shy of going all Cave Man on her ass, walloping her over the head and dragging her back to his room by the hair, but there is one big problem.... Super Gran! 

Paisley's grandmother is there to hear the reading of a will. She bears a striking resemblance to the pink panther, given her obsession with wearing everything pink including her hair. I hate to think what is going on in her knickers... bows, tinsel or a Vajazzle. The way she is described I picture something like this... with less wrinkles and pink hair.

She takes no nonsense and often leave people confused it her wake. She may come across as all sweet and innocent with her pink slippers and crazy hair, but if you cross her she will bitch slap you into next week with one lashing of her tongue. The reading of the will announces that her Grandmother has inherited some estate and obviously she wants to stay to get it all sorted out. Plus she can see the attraction between Creighton and Paisley, as the old saying goes 'Don't make love at the garden gate, love is blind but the neighbours ain't.'

Throw in some masterful growling of 'Ye will be mine, Lassie' and whispers of 'My beloved' and a readers legs are knocked as bandy as Paisleys. You want her to jump him and use him for sex just so you know if he is all talk and no action. The reader becomes invested in finding out what is under that kilt... it's big... so big I nicknamed it Nessie after the Loch Ness Monster. I envy Paisley for experiencing the power of that brute between her legs. He did waffle on a bit too much for my liking during the nookie scenes so I would have to shove something in his mouth him to shut him, but hey that's what tits are for! No one wants a running commentary Creighton, just enjoy yourself while it lasts because as with every romance novel, love is tested.

Paisley's dickhead of a fiancé.... yes, she is engaged...  is a vet from America who wants to exploit her talents for his own financial gain. He is forcing her to showcase her talents to the world and turns up for a showdown with Mr Big Willy himself. A cock fight commences to win the heart of the bear whisperer... you will have to read it to see what happens.

His hot brothers, have stories of their own in this series to look forward to (wit woo). Add to that magic, witches, warlocks, haunted castles, shifters, some bad men who need to be mauled and you have the gist of this first book in the series. It reminded me of the film 'High Spirits' in certain parts and I love that film... these clips makes me laugh as Liam Neeson drools as much as Creighton in it and is just as naughty. 'Ooo what a woman.' (click the links above each pic to watch the clip)

High Spirits Film Ghostly Shower

High Spirits Seducing Sharon

As expected there is a climatic end to the book that makes your eyes speed read to know what happens, while your brain doesn't want it to end yet so tries to slow your eyes down to no avail. Reader problems #10.

How many stars - 5*'s

The author took on the challenge of writing a story in a language she didn't have a firm grasp of. In order to ensure it was as authentic and accurate as possible she sort out authors and friends who did. Her publisher enjoyed the first so much they signed her up for the series.

It is a story that can easily be picked up and transport you to the Highlands for a wee visit. It is nothing to serious, or emotionally draining to read. It is fun, sexy and escapism. I look forward to the rest of the series.

Who would I recommend it to?

It is not historical romance but has aspects of heritage and folklore so you will enjoy it even if you usually read Historical Romances.

If you loved Outlander and want something to fill the Highlander gap while waiting on the next in the series this will sate that hunger.

If you love to read books where male chauvinism is displayed like a peacock strutting its feathers, only to have it's feathers ruffled by a hen who will not be pecked, you will love this book.He basically gets a kick in the ghoulies so hard they shoot up inside him like a pinball and he risks heart break... that is what you get for being possessive and demanding.  Affection is to be earnt, along with trust, and yes being hung like a donkey helps but no one likes an Ass. Unless it's this fine one! Let me see you shake that tail-feather.

Check out the series here. Read, till your eyes bleed. Don't forget to support authors by leaving a review.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/A-Highlanders-Obsession-Beloved-ebook/dp/B00ILX9WC0

Capturing the Earl's Love: 5* Book Review (A FREE Novella)

This is a lovely novella from Jane Lark. (Previously published as 'Captured Love' but renamed and re-released as a FREE Novella by HarperImpulse as part of Jane's Historical series)

I read this story on a train to London. When I arrive in London I walked through Russell Square Park towards the British Museum, wondering how many romantic scenes the trees had witness. Did the huge tree on the corner have a favourite couple and is so what era were they from? How many chose the big tree on the corner in the shade to rendezvous or kissed beneath it's branches. Were initials carved into the bark that went back over a century? The reason for those thoughts were brought on by reading this short story and sent my mind back to the first in the series, where Ellen and Edward secretly met in a park. How dashing must a gentleman have looked stood underneath that tree waiting to walk beside you in a park as part of a courtship. (Swooooon)

I continued to reading the novella later that day on a bench in the London's National History Museum (it had been a long day and I was resting my feet while others went to see a Wooly Mammoth), plus it was an ideal place to read a historical romance. I finished it off on the train ride home. (Picture of it in my bag)

While it was a quick read, I would have liked it to be longer and more developed. It did seem compressed at times but I accepted it for what it was, a short look at another characters love life, Rupert, who we met in the first story of this wonderful series. (The Illicit Love of a Courtesan. Reviewed on this blog)

It tells a story of how women were used as bargaining chips by their fathers to gain higher status in society, and the pressures put on them to attain the best marriage they could to help elevate their fathers position. Conveying the snobbery where climbing the social ladder was frowned upon by those born into titles and no amount of finishing school could rub off the stigma attached to that. You would always be a polished turd. Unless you marry someone of great power, then no one would dare think it again for fear of your husband shunning them in business affairs.

Meredith's character reminded me of Brittany Murphy in Clueless. A red head who had been made over to look the part but would often giggle too loudly and seemed out of place. She foolishly set her sights on one man and falling head over heels in love for him even though she knew he would never marry anyone as low born as she.

Unfortunately for Meredith, Rupert couldn't stand to be around her. She was his sisters pet project and a thorn in his side. Her gooey eyed looks, her over tight claim on his arm when escorting them across a room, drove him crazy... but he wasn't blind to the assets she possessed and how well she used them. It irritated him that she stirred his loins and that his cousin, Edward, encouraged her advances.

The pivotal scene depicts Meredith being thrown into a desperate situation, thanks to her fathers greed in business, which results in her making a rash decision that affects not only her life, but Rupert's too. Being a noble man Rupert takes responsibility for his part, as the actions cannot be undone. His happiness will be forfeit in order to protect the family name and his honour.

For those who don't understand history and the ramifications of those actions, it can seem a little far fetched, but in reality this is what happened in society and a man's word was his honour. A man would be held accountable for his actions by his peers and mistakes were not easily brushed under the carpet.

The story is wrapped up pretty swiftly as it is novella but I don't think it matters very much as we will see more of them in the other books in this series. It had the right amount of sexual tension and historical drama, plus there was a happy ever after for not just one character in this book, but several. Along with piquing our interest in other characters who we know will be the main protagonists of other books in the series.

Rumour has it that HarperImpulse will be leaving this story as free. The only downside to that is 'Free stories' often receive low reviews by people who would never have purchased the book, are not interested in the story or era, and only want to write a review so it appears as 'verified review' and bumps up their 'reviewer rating'.

This was a lovely read, ideal for a quick train journey or Sunday lying around with your feet up. Several of my friends have read the story and enjoyed it too. Now it's your turn.

By My Side - Wendy Lou Jones - 4*'s Book Review

Ok this is a weird one for me as I loved this story... loved it... but I hated the ending and didn't see the need for the beginning either so I am awarding it 4*’s. (Contains spoilers so I can explain what did and didn't work for me)

Here are the reason why I initially gave it 5*'s.

• I sat up too late reading this story and couldn’t wait to restart it the next day, that is a 5* in my eyes. 

• I was invested in the characters, felt twinges in my heart, got offended and frustrated when they did... so 5*’s.

• The author was a doctor so her medical terminology is spot on for the times and she has insider knowledge of how fast gossip spreads around the hospital.

Why did it lose a star? 

Mainly the fact I hated the ending and that was a big sulking moment for me. I could have taken away more stars for the bits I will mention below, but seeing as I loved Katy and Adam's story it was worth 4*... if it had just been about them and not Lena or the dodgy ending, I would have given full marks. Hell I would have give it 6* out of 5* ;) Remember 4*'s is a nothing to be sniffed at!

The Author is Wendy Lou Jones, she came up with this story after seeing a redhead in a Chemist. She recently hunted her down and freaked her out by confessing she used her as a character in her book. Oh and made her pose for a photo (I am sure an injunction has been issued haha) Wendy is also obsessed with Richard Armitage so I think he is her 'Adam' in this novel, as the descriptions match.

I like to picture Katy and Adam like this in my mind. ;)

THE BLURB

The blurb was a bit confusing, I was expecting to read a story about a woman who had been cheated on and how she overcame it with help from a stranger. Then there was a bit underneath where two people are mentioned 'Katy' and 'Adam' and I realise they are the love birds... so who is Lena and why do we need her in the story... let me clear it up for you. Lena is a character who had been cheated on, failed her exams and attempted to kill herself to escape it all. Despite that her mother takes her to a funeral of a stranger. There someone begins to tell her the love story of Katy and Adam, who met shortly after Katy's Grandfather funeral, and how they were destined to fall in love as they were perfect for each other... not exactly what you want to hear at a funeral, let alone when you have had your heart broken and recently tried to put yourself in a coffin because of it. It just seemed really inappropriate and insensitive, plus her mother taking her to a funeral and leaving her alone to get her ears chewed off was weird. 

My main gripe with the book blurb is that I don't think it sells this book, it is misleading as Lena is not the main character she is more like a witness or a walk on character with maybe six lines throughout the entire book. To have the blurb based on her and not 'Katy' and Adam' was a misleading in my eyes.

SHELF APPEAL

The book cover doesn’t do the story justice and I am not sure the title is right either. I would have preferred Bed Side Manner as that was mainly what was in question from the start. Katy is not happy with Adam's bedside manner and he is well known for being a grump.

By my side, doesn't sound like it is a romance novel set in a medical profession and neither does the cover. I know a number of people who look for medical romances, especially my friends who work in hospitals or the medical profession, so it is missing a marketing opportunity there. ‘Bed Side Manner’ would have been more suitable. 

The cover is a hand holding a butterfly, I have no idea what that refers to other than a soul visiting at a funeral, and whilst we start this story at a funeral, there is far more scope for a cover set in medical romance. Even something basic like a stethoscope in a heart shape on a pair of scrubs, or hanging around a doctors neck would draw in those medical romance lovers. 

Yes it is a beautiful cover but I didn't feel it was relevant to the story and to me books with covers and titles like that usually hold a depressing story about abuse or trauma. I avoid them. This had a depressing ending but the main story was a delight to read.

ENDING - WHAT WAS THE ISSUE?

I mentioned I didn’t like the ending but I won't say exactly why, as it is a huge spoiler. It is safe to say the entire Lena part of the story was a put off for me. I would have preferred the story to just be about the protagonist Katy and her love interest Adam. Set in a hospital... simple. 

I didn’t like the jumping back and forth in time like the Princess Bride meets the Note Book, to someone being told a story at a funeral and I most certainly did not like the end. In fact the words ‘are you F***ing kidding me’ were yelled at my kindle. Good on the author for making me do that but the depressing ending wasn't explained either, I was left wondering what the hell happened. Like I nodded off and missed the end of the movie.

If I had my way, I would chop the end off and get rid of the third person, Lena, as she wasn’t needed. It turned a beautiful romance into something morbid. It felt a bit like the story was being turned it into a Greek tragedy for the sake of shock tactics. In romance the whole point is to see a happy ending without the macabre side. That detachment and melancholy of having a story end with uncertainty or tragedy is not for me. I would start it where Katy is at her grandfathers funeral, cut out Lena, embellish the two of them finally admitting they love each other and give me a 'they live happily ever after but argue frequently' ending.

In the debut novel from this author I struggled with the damage inflicted on the characters health and felt it was unnecessarily grim but hey life is cruel sometimes. I was hoping for a healthier outcome in this case so to see that type of ending again, and to the extreme, made me realise I am never going to get a happy ending from this author. There will be a tragic or fragile ending. No rainbows and unicorns here.... more like life’s a bitch and it’s gunning for you so get shagging everyone before you die.

FRUSTRATION

I spent hours reading this and wishing they would hurry up and sort themselves out. Admit their feelings and have hot make up sex which ends with a marriage proposal and kids... Yep I am that soppy.  Look I even picked out a baby grow.

When I got to the sex, it faded to black... I wasn't happy. To top it off when the characters are to all intents and purposes going to have 'the talk’... it was skipped and replaced with ‘but we had tonight’. Effectively booting me, the reader, who has invested hours in this book over the space of two days, out of the story and closing the door behind me. Only to be replaced with a time jump back to Lena and an ending I could throw rocks at.

I didn’t get to see what they had to say to one another, after ten chapters of ‘will they’ or ‘won’t they’. I felt robbed. I would have preferred to leave that door open and witness what was being said. Jeeze we read romance for confessions of the heart, not narrative from a third party sometime in the future. I want to be there, in the room like a fly on the wall when they confess their love for one another and get naked.

Plus I then had to read the ending that makes your blood run cold and your mood turn from happy to ‘what was the point in reading the story’. You can’t fan the flames of passion, snuff out the light and thrown dirt on it without readers feeling like your story has been hijacked by George R Martin and turned into an episode of Game of Thrones. It was an unnecessary twist of fate for the characters, which was cruel and disappointing. I felt like it was for shock tactics, even though I had an idea it was going all Bruce Willis a few chapters in. I just hoped the author didn't take that road... boy was I disappointed.

I had envisaged the characters singing songs like this at their wedding... No such luck.

I would recommended it, but with a warning to skip the ending as I wish I had. I even forced a friend who works in A&E to read it immediately to see if she felt the same about certain parts and 'yes,' she did. I didn't even tell her what niggled me and she sent near verbatim feedback in her email... like me she loved it, just not the Lena bits or ending. Oh and the skipping the 'talk' made her mad.

So I am going to pretend this is the ending... (the dancing bit before the shoulder tap) 

IT Girl - Nic Tatano - 5* Book Review

Anchor man meets Sex in the City - that is the best way to describe this new piece of work from the delightful Sicilian and New Yorker Nic Tantano.

Nic has vast experience in the area of Television networking to support this series. His career as a weatherman, reporter, anchor and producer for various television networks ensures he knows the real gossip from the green room which helps make this series so believable. He is confident in his approach to the subject matter and I can't help but picture him back in his weatherman dating days, looking something like this.

Although Nic knows roller skating on a first date is not as romantic as Xanadu has you believe... his real life dating traumas which he often shares with his readers have added to his witty humour which transfers well to the characters he creates for us.

I never watch morning TV, I am a press snooze till there are 20 minutes to be out the door girl, so I don't really understand the complexities of anchoring or the decisions behind who graces the screen. Nic depicts that well and had me wondering why the hell someone would find that appealing as a career. I assume that being an anchor is far more desirable in the States than here in the UK where we actually have a show called 'This Morning'. I don't think our TV presenters get paid the figures mentioned in this book and they certainly don't look like supermodels but they do have a wicked sense of humour!  (Check out this clip of Fern Cotton and Philip Schofield)

I pictured someone like Amy Adams for Nic's leading lady. A redhead who is terrified of missing out on a career opportunity or gaining weight, but most of all in losing her edge as a political journalist.

I noticed the play on the surnames with the two anchors 'Summer' and 'Winter'.. very seasonal. I also loved that the protagonist had friends, love life and balls big enough to ensure her career was not affected by whoever was in her bed. She's not afraid to kick a hottie to the curb whilst dressed in nothing but a red thong and armed with squirty cream... my kind of girl.

There were a lot of references to 'legs' so I am going to say the author has a leg fetish to go with his obvious passion for red heads whatever shade, copper top, strawberry blonde or pillar box.

You can easily forget that the author is male, which is a gift in itself. His depiction of girly feelings and gossip make the characters relatable and relevant. Not forgetting the hot males with stubble, 'long dimples' and winning smiles to melt the knickers of any sleep deprived mother. Both are made drool worthy whatever your sexuality reading this. I also made me realise that putting off shaping my eyebrows and shaving my legs would not pass in 'Anchor World'. You can't live in leggings and hide a unibrow behind a fringe or baseball cap... Oh and the camera adds 20lbs.

This is the first instalment and I would have preferred to read the entire thing. I am used to finishing a book and being left on a cliffhanger makes me sulk. Do I want to read more... yep I want to see who the love interest is and I want it now! That makes it 5*'s, along side the ability to make me give a flying fuck about morning TV.

I may even wake extra early tomorrow to watch morning TV... then again I may just set the Tivo and bash the shit out of the snooze button. 

The Illicit Love of a Courtesan - Jane Lark - BOOK REVIEW

I can't even begin to explain how much I loved this book... maybe the fact that after reading the first chapter I put my kindle down and applauded the author. Yes, I clapped! I've never done that before but I was excited by what I had just read and felt somewhat naughty for enjoying it  ;)

This is where I remind you that you can read the first chapter for free on Amazon and experience it for yourself. I promise you will not be disappointed.

The first chapter was not only beautifully written, it captured your attention, leaving you so invested in the characters there was no way you could put the book down. Add to that the 'Oh my god' moments where the author doesn't make miracles happen to save the protagonist. She is not living the fairytale, she is more like a raven haired Rapunzel kept in a town house and only allowed out for the sadistic pleasure of others. During which time you can feel the bile rise in your throat the same as the character.

The author keeps the suspense and drama moving along steadily. Depicting the scenes with historical accuracy and enthusiasm, allowing you to envisage the world they live in to the point you can smell the tobacco or feel the cold air on your cheeks.

There were so many wonderfully romantic lines to make you swoon and wish for your very own Edward. His adoration of her is obsessive and possessive but above all sexy as he knows he is head of heels in love with her. He is ready to gambol through life so long as it is with her. There is no sacrifice too big and her past is 'her past' as far as he is concerned. Even when her secrets are revealed one by one, he loves her more for them.

We all want a love like that and to read it described so well in this novel made me swoon and pine for the days when men were gallant, respectful... yes chauvinistic... but historical romances are. Even so, the line between a woman knowing her place, respecting her husband and being given the right to make decisions is evenly balanced. Ellen is self sacrificing and humble but she is no push over.

They was more nookie in 336 pages than any historical romance I've ever read. Just count yourself lucky that you can't get pregnant from reading, not that you would complain where Edward was concerned.

I enjoyed it from beginning to end and have decided I would read anything by Jane Lark... hell I'd even read her shopping list!

I am delighted that I have a several of her novels in my library including 'Capturing the Earls Love', 'The Passionate Love of a Rake' and 'The Scandalous Love of a Duke' which feature characters you meet in this novel. Also 'Capturing the Earls Love' is a free Novella so you can download it today.

Here is a treat... Jane Lark reading an excerpt from 'The Illicit Love of a Courtesan'.

You can purchase them here: Amazon and leave a review. 

THE ROMAN - CAROLINE STORER (Book Review) 5*s

I loved this book. If this book cover doesn't have you reaching to read the blurb, nothing will. What a sexy Bastard! High five to the cover artist as that is shelf appeal.

Perfect for my Spartacus Hangover and fed my Dustin Clare obsession as I could easily picture him as 'The Roman'. Here he is, in all his Gladiator glory... feel free to lick the screen and picture him too.

The author of 'The Roman' depicts with ease the beauty of those times and the importance of social status but doesn't linger. We start off with the POV from the Roman as he celebrates a win Ben Hur style, which automatically makes Marcallas fearless, sexy, brave and down right desirable. 

On top of that we get an insight into the inner working of his mind, he is proud, independent, rich but like everyone else he has a heart... which someone bitch ripped out of his chest leaving him vengeful. This in turn doused the book in angst ridden sexual tension. Hurrah!

We change POV to the female Protagonist. I have to say though, I didn't like her name. Justina, seemed too modern for me, but it is a Roman name, it was just hard to settle it in the time period for me. On the plus side she was sweet, innocent, used, abused and loyal. Her life taking the path most young girls faced during that time period, but you know it could have been worse. You had to admire her, especially for someone so young. She was shrewd, intelligent and talented. 

The POV stayed with her for a vast majority of the story. It was told in a modern way so we could read it with ease and not get lost in a history lesson. Having said that it was clear the author had done her homework. I learnt a lot without even realising it and found myself squealing at the mention of Pompeii and Herculaneum as I knew what was coming. Plus for those who are missing Spartacus, there are two Hercules films out soon and Pompeii so it's an ideal time for this book release. 

As with any romance we want some nookie and were not disappointed. It was not cringe worthy, it was sweet, brave and about bloody time! The water wasn't the only hot thing.

All in all, a great read for those who love historical romance, and a lovely starter for those who are interested in the genre but don't want anything too taxing. It is not overly wordy or flooded with so many historical facts it makes it feels like homework. It is an ideal Sunday read that will have you booking a holiday to Rome or throwing a toga party. 

You can get a copy here http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Roman-HarperImpulse-Historical-Romance-ebook/dp/B00HY5ZCR0 

THE KISS BEFORE CHRISTMAS - SOPHIE PEMBROKE - BOOK REVIEW 5*

Loved it! 

You can tell the author has studied English Literature as the story is effortlessly written, which in turn makes it a pleasure to read. Also well edited which meant there were no gaps or scene jumps leaving the reader disorientated as to where the scene was taking place or whose POV they were reading. 

A story full of secrets, historical relationship dramas, spiced up with sexual tension and yummy kisses. Add a few snotty posh people, who no one really wants to spend Christmas with, as they are obnoxious, insensitive and act as though need a spring of holly removed from their Ice cold hearts!

It was a nice change to see a couple who are in their 30's and not pigeon holed into 18-25 age group like most books these days. It made it far more interesting and believable that the characters had relationships before and now they were 'love shy'. 

I enjoyed it, read it cover to cover in 2 hours and look forward to more from this author.

SANTA WORE LEATHERS - VONNIE DAVIS - BOOK REVIEW 5*

Sexy, feisty, witty and Christmassy
I love the authors ease with words. She tells the story with care, enthusiasm and more wit than you could shake a stick at. Just my type of book. She is on my favourites list. 

I was laughing my duck off in the first few pages and several chapters in I lost count of the scrotum references, whether it be the dogs bits or the hotties. All of which made me laugh. 

It's a story with a broken heart which needs to be mended, trust issues from previous shitty relationships and a 'don't judge a book by it's cover' love interest. The heart is owned by a firey, sulky, red headed protagonist who fights off the advances of her new sexy neighbour, only to have her legs knocked bandy with one 'blue steel' look. One minute she is say 'Ah, ah' and the 'Ooo aaaa'. The fact he is a fireman and knows how to handle her firey temperament as well as get her hot under the collar doesn't go a miss. 

I was a bit peeved at his waffling on throughout the naughty bits, it was like a radio presenter or sports commentators. I would yell 'Just F*** me already!' or pull my blindfold off and gag him with it.

Their relationship challenged misconceptions on who we chose to date or not, based on what the person does for a living. I for instance would never consider dating an accountant no matter how good he was with his digits (ahem). I can't save enough money to next pay day and often store it in my bra. I am an accountants worst nightmare. I have visions of them asking for a receipt after sex... not that I charge but you get my meaning... preconceived ideals. 

This book reminds us that love is a tricky, addictive and euphoric. The broken hearted avoid like the plague only to fall hard and fast just when they thought they were safe. Most of us end up with the exact opposite of what we think we are looking for and all have to surrender our hearts, as that is the price of love. Even if yours is battered and bruised, it can bounce back like Rocky and knock a guy for six.

SAY IT WITH SEQUINS (The Rumba) - GEORGIA HILL - BOOK REVIEW 4*

If you love Strictly Come Dancing, Dancing with the Stars etc, you will love this. Picture a Welsh Childrens TV presenter (I pictured Gethin Jones) and a West End actress both signing up for a reality Dance comp in the hope to raise their profile and get new job offers. The usual reason Stars sign up.

Throw in some sequins, dodgy revelling dresses and unwanted intimacy with your dance partner, who is a moron and only happy when he has a stick insect to throw around like pizza dough. She's the under dog who can't find her bark to defend against her trainers bite, and the comments from the judges leave her confidence in tatters. It's something we all witness on a Saturday night coming up to Christmas on these shows.

Will she find her feet? Will her new friendship with the Welsh hottie ever develop into a first kiss? Read and find out! ;)

THE FIRST CHRISTMAS WITHOUT YOU - MICHELLE BETHAM - BOOK REVIEW 5*

Any book that can have you worried for the protagonist in the first chapter, heartbroken for them in the second and hopeful in the third, has my vote!

I got interrupted several times reading this and as it is a very emotional read I contemplated whether I should risk getting arrested for assault, just so I could finish reading it in peace.

It keeps you interested, as you want to confirm your suspicions but it also allows you to suspend disbelief in some instances and pine for those who are no longer with us.

I am usually far more interested in the dialogue than the destination but reading this at Christmas time made me feel more festive than my belly full of turkey. The author captured the magic and beauty of Lapland. It was like a tour guide. I would have liked more interaction between the two love interests rather than a tour but I felt it was more about her emotional journey than the relationship. Plus it is a novella so short and sweet, just like Christmas!

ON THE SCENT - ANGELA CAMPBELL - BOOK REVIEW 5*

I will have an order of Henry Cavill inspired hunk with a side portion of cute pets in danger please.

Why 5*'s? Here is how I worked it out.

Would I sleep with Zach, Brian and Kellan... yep 1* E.J.... No. - 1* But there was three hotties, imagine the fun... add that star back! 1*

Was the protagonist a wimp... No... make that 2** 

Did I want them to 'kiss already' like back in the day of Moonlighting with Bruce Willis... yep 3***

Were the pets cute... of course 4**** However, the cat was sly and grumpy - 1* making it 3***

Was the storyline believable, full of mystery and a twitch of fiction... Yep 4****

Did they fall out and make up, then finally jump each other with more passion than the leg humping dog ... yep add a star making it 5***** 

The back story with Zach and his brother was a nice lead to the next story. Bring it on!

THE LAST KISS - BRIGID COADY - BOOK REVIEW 5*

A lovely 'short' which perfectly depicts the heartbreak and joy of the last kiss. Some kisses are branded into our soul, a wonderful memory we dust off in our later years. The kind that reminds us we were truly kissed. Perfect!

Lipstick on His Collar - Brigid Coady - Book Review 5*

Wonderful short that depicts how the temptation of a forbidden kiss can be irresistible and even if your conscience is screaming at you, you will turn a deaf ear just for a taste.

ONE KISS - LISA FOX - BOOK REVIEW 4*

A story of attraction whilst in the friend zone with a work colleague/bestie. Add to it the fear of falling in love with the risk of falling out later. Are you willing to risk losing that friendship for the sake of having someone to kiss at midnight?

I enjoyed reading this story late on a Friday night. It made me want to go out, party and kiss someone just for the hell of it. 

The chemistry and attraction between the two was realistic and had you anticipating the kiss before it happened. The kisses were wonderfully descriptive and made you miss a good old snog or grab your partner and pucker up. 

The only slight negative for me was sometimes it seemed to mood swing a bit too quickly so I got readers whiplash but it got back on track quick enough. I also found some parts overly crude for a romantic scene. I just felt that certain sentences detracted from the moment and would have been more appropriate in another scene. 

WRITING A REVIEW...TIPS.

I've been asked to explain how I compose my reviews and give some tips, as some people are reluctant to write or post them on their blog, in case they get it wrong or receive backlash. This is how I do it. I have no idea how others do theirs but here we go...

Firstly, you can never get it wrong, it is your opinion. Second, a review can be 20 words long on Amazon. It would take a reader 1 minute to type 2 sentences in the review section e.g. 'I loved this story. It made me laugh, cry, swoon and fall in love with the authors style of writing.' See easy! Anyone can do it. The problem is, they often don't as they assume it has to be in depth and they don't have time. Other assume you need a degree in English or be an expert on the subject matter. Nope, a review is purely what you thought of it. Examples:

'It was good. I enjoyed it. I really like the end as it was action packed. Can't wait for the next book.' 5*

'I liked it but felt there were too many questions left unanswered. I am hoping they get covered in the sequel.' 4*

'It took me a while to get into the story as the first few chapters were a bit like a history lesson as opposed to a historical romance.' 3* 

It can be as simple as that. I am not a review snob. I don't care who the publisher is or the author. When I review a book it is based on the shelf appeal and blurb, whether is be online or in a shop. An author wants reviews, they don't expect you to be a wordsmith. As an author myself I get the best reviews from mums at home with a baby in one arm and an ereader in the other or people sneak reading at work or school. 

NETGALLEY

I also review ARC's via NetGalley which I was invited to join last year as a professional reader. I can request a copy of a story I am interested in but I also receive requests from publishers and authors as me to review a story. You then download as a file or send to your kindle as a 'personal document'. You have a certain number of days or weeks before it is archived by the publisher and you can no longer read it. Sometimes you can request a story and the publisher refuses as you have not got enough feedback from others for them to judge if you are any good at reviews.  

I mainly review at the authors request. When I am sent ARC's by the author or publisher my reviews are more in depth. They are for feedback. I point out plot holes and highlight typos etc. When I write a review I do it honestly with a positive mindset and ensure any feedback is constructive and not destructive critique. If I don't like certain sections of the story I'll tell the author/publisher why. 

I won't review a story I don't find interesting. I will suggest other reviewers as an alternative if I know someone would enjoy reading it. 

I will repeat what I said before 'You do not have to be a professional reader, have a degree in English Literature or be a writer to review a story. Anyone who reads a story can review it.' 

MY RULES FOR REVIEWING

My number one rules is... start out positive. My mindset from the beginning is 5* as the author has taken the time and effort to write a story. It is their baby. They have been through the conception, which is always the best bit. They have carried the story around with them for months, sometimes years and been through the horror of editing labour.

They are finally showing us their baby, dressed in a posh book cover, name blazing across it and asking 'is it beautiful?'. No one wants to be told their baby's ugly, the names stupid and it stinks. Leave that to the trolls, manners cost nothing. 

STARTING WITH 5* IS MY CHOICE

Some reviewers like to build up to it, there is no hard and fast rule. I am basically giving the author a 'high five' for completing a novel. I only take away stars if something really niggles or confuses me and I have to step out of the world they created to get my bearings e.g. flicking back a few pages or google something I know to be factually incorrect. 

Throughout the process I jot notes on a pad of what I love, hate or spot as an error. I remove a star if they lose me e.g. can't work out who is talking or we change location half way though a conversation. Also if they take too long describing something, as it loses the momentum, especially in a battle scene. I hate poorly thought-out sex scenes where it ends up being more like a game of people jenga/twister as opposed to an erotic/romantic scene. You'd need tits on your back and the flexibility of a contortionist to get into some of them. 


I often spot where the editor has removed a scene but referred to it later on, I point those out in a private message. Not in the review. 

A story will lose a star if it's full of plot holes or races to the end for the sake of 'word count' and leaves me with questions. So many try to cram in 50,000 or 85,000 words. Pay attention to the page count as you can review 3 stories in your TBR pile if the page count is e.g. 47 or 56, where as another is 287. Some are just one shorts and 10 pages. Get it out the way. 

HONESTY

I always tell the author the parts I didn't enjoy or where they confused me, in a private message not on the review. If it is published and I will allude to finding areas confusing but I won't be specific in my review as I would have already fed back to the author. Most importantly I tell them the parts I loved and if it is a series, what I am looking forward to reading in the next. I will also explain where they lost or regained a star and why. I give stars back for awesome bits! 

I don't post reviews lower than 3* in public, but I do feedback to the author direct. They have always been grateful and agreed on areas of improvement. I've never had anyone object to my reviews. I am often asked to read drafts to help other authors with document blindness or writers block. That is how I started reviewing. 

PROMOTING YOUR REVIEWS

If I like a story and think it is worth reading I will post my review on Amazon, Goodreads, Facebook, Twitter, blog etc but only when the story is published. Not before. If I don't like a story I won't post a review. Simple. 

Enjoy reading the story and only at the end write the review, don't keep stopping. Yes, I note things down but it's nothing more than 'pg89 typo, 3rd line, Out not Our'. Those notes go to the publisher not in the review. 

DON'T POST SPOILERS

You are reviewing a story. Not retelling it. If your review contains a spoiler post a warning on it. 'This review contains spoilers' as there is nothing worse. Don't become a numpty like those who spoilt Harry Potter and Bridget Jones for people. 

5 STARS - WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

You are supporting an author with a review. It doesn't have to be 5*'s to be a great review, people see the scale very differently and it can vary depending on the site you are using. Don't feel pressured to give 5*'s. No matter how popular the book, it will never get straight 5's. In fact the more popular a book gets, the more outspoken the reviewers. Yes it's true that publishers don't often promote a review unless it is 5*'s but that's not important, an honest review is. 

In my mind (1) is poo, (2) is Meh, (3) is 'yeah it's ok', (4) is 'read it you'll like it, (5) can be varying things 'Read it, I want to discuss it with you' or 'I loved the shit out of this book'.

To other reviewers it could be (1) is 'WTF', (2) is 'Absolute Crap', (3) is 'Hours of my life wasted', (4) is 'It was ok but I hated most of it', (5) 'Loved the shit out of this book!'  

So as you can see, you can't go wrong. It's an opinion. Your opinion. Your version of the 1-5* and if everyone liked to read the same thing there would be no need for reviewers. Be your own person, give an honest and fair review. Be conscious that there is a person on the receiving end of the words you type. I use the 'granny rule' don't say something in your review that you are not willing to say to a granny. For the record I know some pretty frisky grannies but if you are rude to them, their cat will scratch your eyes out ;) 

Enjoy reviewing! It only needs to be 20 words.